Friday, August 29, 2008

waxing philosophical

I've been thinking about this for days.....friendships are very much like trying to parallel park.

When parallel parking it may take several false starts to get into the space just right. Sometimes you get too close to the car in front of you or you back up into the car behind you or it turns out that no matter how you try, your car just doesn't fit into the space at all and you have to go down to the next street to find an empty space.

The same with friends....

Sometimes you get too close and allow too much information to pass between you so that things get uncomfortably intimate.

Sometimes one friend isn't afraid to say what he or she thinks and manages with a sharp tongue to back all over the other person. Feelings are left crumpled, not unlike front headlights.

In my experience, when either of these things happen, I take a moment and examine the friendship to see if it is worth keeping.

Sometimes, it is I who have done the backing over the feelings and it is I who need to make the necessary repairs to keep the friendship running.

It always saddens me when I come to the realization that the friendship is just never going to work. And that probably I should keep it very superficial.

Sometimes we get lucky and find friendships that are easy-going and that can withstand both the getting too close and the backing over. These friendships are like parking in a grassy field. No lines to stay between, no worrying about jumping the curb, just drive in and park. I am lucky that I have two such best, good friends in Sanna and Ginger.

So it is nothing but love for Sanna and Ginger today!


Sanna said...

that's beautiful! I got choked up!
the feeling is mutual!

Let me tell you that i got a lovely package from jen in the mail this week and she even wrote on one of her GOOD ORANGE note cards and i felt so very special.!


Allknowingjen said...

I really like this analogy! It's very true.
I am going to have to steal- I mean share-it sometime.

Melody said...

You are so wise my friend. I feel exactly the same and sometimes yearn for that close friendship I have had in the past but currently don't. I call them my wal-mart friends - someone you can call and see if they want to go to Wal-mart with you, just cuz.

I had one for several years as an adult, but ironically she turned out to be the "other woman" for my ex. Some have said they think I don't now because of that - and I disagree.

I just haven't found someone who is willing to "parallel park" like I do.

If only you didn't live so damn far away.

Patresa Hartman said...

that is a terrific analogy! so true.

my grassy parking spots are cassie & wendy. :)