It has been on my list of things to do re: routine body beautification/maintenance:
1) shave legs
2) get hair cut
3) get lip and brow wax
5) clip toenails
I had made a Saturday morning appointment two weeks ago for a lip and brow wax, but I pretended to forget about it so that I could sleep in. So yes, I am well aware that I have more hair on my lip than does an adolescent boy trying to grow his first mustache.
But what I don’t need is a husband pointing out that fact.
May I offer exhibit A:
Hairy lipped Jen, to husband as he comes into the kitchen while she is making dinner. “Hello dearest, give us a kiss.”
Hairy-lipped Jen leans in, eyes closed, lips puckered in anticipation of a loving kiss.
Loving kiss never comes.
Hairy-lipped Jen opens her eyes to see husband staring in fascination at her upper lip.
“What?” Hairy-lipped Jen asks in puzzlement.
Husband responds “You have lots of little hairs on your lip” and points to said hairy lip with stubby finger.
Hairy-lipped Jen swats away offending finger and says with great dignity and withering sarcasm “I KNOW and thank you for pointing out the obvious (ass)"
Hairy-lipped Jen turns back to the stove and resists throwing wooden spoon at husband's head as he shambles out of the kitchen innocently asking when dinner will be ready.
It is here that I will point out two things.
1) It is his fault that I need to wax the lip in the first place. Years ago he mentioned my “mustache”. I became so self-conscious about the mustache that I felt compelled to go and get a wax. And you all know, once you start waxing you must keep it up or run the risk of looking like Pancho Villa
2) Turns out that my loving husband had been nipping at the Sambuca bottle before I arrived home and felt emboldened by the liqueur to speak what was on his mind.
To paraphrase that age old adage – “In Sambuca, veritas”
Needless to say, first thing this morning I made an appointment with Vicki at “Kristina Michele” for a lip and brow wax.